The “Unfiltered” Mirror
They say daughters are a gift, but sometimes I think God sent me a mirror. At 29, I’m officially an “adult,” but if I’m being honest, I don’t have my life in a neat little box with a bow on top. I don’t have the “perfectly planned” life that the parenting books talk about.
Most days, I’m just trying to figure out where the matching socks went and why there is a random booger stuck to the couch. (And yes, it’s always the couch. Why?) But then I look at my 6-year-old. My mini-me. She has these bright blue eyes that stand out against my brown ones, but when she looks at me, I see my own silly streak and my habit of saying exactly what’s on her mind. While I’m supposed to be the one teaching her how to grow up, she’s actually the one teaching me how to be.
The Student Becomes the Teacher
Most adults my age are mentally able to process feelings and understand why things happen. But scientifically, children don’t actually reach that level of emotional maturity and “adult” brain processing until their mid-20s.
That is why it is so incredibly important for parents to truly practice what they preach in their home. Our kids are watching our every move, soaking up how we handle stress, how we treat others, and how we talk to God. Lately, the roles have flipped. There are moments when I’m overwhelmed, and my 6-year-old will walk up and give me the exact same pep talk I usually give her. Hearing her refer to God’s goodness instantly puts me into happy, proud “mama tears.”
The Neon Yellow Bat & The Thumbs Up
Yesterday was her first t-ball practice of the season—new team, new coaches, and a lot of nerves. She told me she was scared of messing up. But she grabbed her bag (which is basically bigger than she is) and headed for the field.
When she was placed at shortstop, my heart grew three sizes—if you knew me in high school, you know shortstop was my home. Watching her scout the field and fire the ball to first with a huge smile made me so stinking proud.
Then came batting. She got her helmet on, looked over at me, and I gave her a thumbs up—that’s our “thing” for encouragement. She set her feet, took a breath, and when the coach said “Play ball,” she rared back and whacked that ball with her mighty neon yellow bat! She bolted for first base, turned back to look at me, and I was losing it, clapping and giving her that thumbs up again.
On the car ride home, she wasn’t the nervous girl from earlier. She said, “Mom, I had so much fun. I am so proud of the team and myself. We all did so good.” Then, with zero hesitation, she asked, “Is my first game tomorrow?” She was ready to go.
God’s Thumbs Up
But here is the real beauty of it: it isn’t just about t-ball. Just like that practice, when I am having my “adult moments”—when the stress of life feels heavy or I feel like I’m failing at this parenting thing—my little girl is right there to remind me of the truth.
She reminds me that God is giving me that thumbs up for encouragement. Through her words and her hugs, He lets me know that I am doing just fine. He uses her tiny voice to tell me to keep going, to keep swinging, and to remember that He is in the stands cheering for me even louder than I cheer for her.
Lesson 1: You Don’t Need a Plan to Have Joy
At 29, I stress about the “what’s next.” But my daughter? She wakes up, sees a butterfly, and decides it’s the best day of her life. She’s taught me that joy isn’t a destination you reach once you have your life figured out—it’s something you choose right in the middle of the mess.
Lesson 2: It’s Okay to be a “Work in Progress”
I used to think that by the time I hit my late 20s, I’d have all the answers. My daughter has shown me that it’s okay that I don’t. She doesn’t care if I’m a “perfect adult”—she just cares that I’m in the stands giving her a thumbs up. She has taught me that God doesn’t need me to be perfect to use me; He just needs me to be present.
A Note to My Mini-Me
To my sweet 6-year-old: Thank you for being the version of me that reminds me to laugh. Thank you for showing me that even if our life doesn’t look like a Pinterest board, it is filled with a whole lot of Jesus, a lot of dirt, and a mighty neon yellow bat.
I might not have the “adulting” thing down to a science yet, but as long as I have you by my side, I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. You aren’t just my daughter; you’re my favorite teacher.
The Truth (NLT)
Matthew 18:3: “Then he said, ‘I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven.’”
Psalm 127:3: “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.”
3 John 1:4: “I could have no greater joy than to hear that my children are following the truth.”
Let’s Talk!
- The Reflection: When did you realize your child was a “mini-me” of you? Was it a funny phrase, a look, or a specific personality trait?
- The Lesson: What is the most profound thing your child has ever “taught” you when you were having a rough day?
- The “Work in Progress”: Do you ever feel the pressure to have it all together at a certain age? How do you give yourself grace in the middle of the “boogers on the couch” moments?
- God’s Voice: Has your child ever referred to God or prayer in a way that moved you to tears? Share that story below!
Nahomi Allen Writes 
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